Monday, Monday

Rainy day and Mondays...
Well, as the song goes, they always get me down -- not really. I'm actually ok with Mondays AND rainy days. I'm weird that way. I look at Mondays now as new beginnings, a new week with more opportunities. And rain? I find it cleansing. I love to listen to it. Thunder not so much, but rain, I love. Kids are back to school after a week off for spring break. I enjoyed the lay ins last week but also did absolutely nothing. I had an audition, finally after a month of crickets. Didn't book, again. Still very much frustrated with that part of my life and had a good cry about things last week. Like the rain, very cleansing.
I weighed in this morning and I've gained every pound back that I lost over the past month and then some. I ate myself silly the last couple of weeks. I did all my measuring and I'm ready to get back into the action. I worked out this morning to "My Bikini Butt". http://www.mybikinibutt.info/
I've always had a giant ass and I would really love to have a tight little one so I'm giving this a whirl. I can already feel it. Today's was isolated movements and stretches targeting the lower body. This one started with burpees. Yikes! I did a modified version since I'm so overweight, I didn't want to stress any joints out prematurely. I'll work up to the full ones. It was short and sweet at about 15 minutes. I figure I will alternate those with CT50, Yoga and Turbulence Training. That should give me plenty of variety. As far as food goes, my plan is to eat as natural as possible. Smoothies, raw vegetables and lean meats. I work every night this week except for my birthday so it should be easy to stick with my food choices without worrying about dinnertime and what to cook for everyone. Plus, I'll get plenty of exercise with walking, bending and lifting at work.
My goal is to get down at least 2 sizes by the next social event in May. I'm attending a screening and possible a SAG event that same weekend and I want to look great! The trick is to keep my eyes on the prize. I'm motivated now. I need to do this. I need my confidence back.

I have a counseling appointment tomorrow and I'm looking forward to it. I need more tools. The daily Reiki has been interesting and I've definitely been sleeping better entering sleep with it. My affirmation has been just so so. I had hoped I would have some great news to share with my minister tomorrow. I'm trying not to be disappointed that I don't. Just keep going. The seed is planted.